Hearing Her First Heartbeat Was Life Changing

This happened toward the end of the year around November. I had just come back from a trip and at the time of my life I was really at a rocky, low state of mind just trying to figure out my life. Three weeks after I came back from the trip, I found out I was pregnant. I was lost. I didn't know what to do. I was literally crying, freaked out because I didn't really expect for it to happen.

 It put me in fear because I didn't want my mother knowing. At the time we didn't have the best relationship - I didn't have the best relationship with any of my family members. My mom and I were just never close and always arguing. Telling her, “I just found I was pregnant,” I was in fear that she was going to actually kick me out or something like that due to her experience when she was first pregnant with me.

 Abortion was an option for me. I thought about it just out of the fear of being judged by my family. The hospital got me connected to two places, RETA and a women’s center, which I didn't know at the time and my first instinct was to call RETA. I got connected with them and met them the following day which is where I met Melody, a nurse. Melody was sweet. She was very helpful and asked a lot of questions about my life and what made me come here and everything like that. I took a couple tests and it was confirmed that I was three weeks pregnant. She said if I had any more questions or want to meet with her, just to come to the RETA building.

 Amber was a person that I talked to at RETA because she had an experience in her life where she did go through abortion and she regretted it very much. Something just brought me to keep the baby and do the experience by myself. At the time I did not care about doing this by myself because I didn't want to put my body through something and go through regret and have to be even in more depression than what I already was.

 After that I just started building a relationship with Melody, getting to know her and her getting to know me - about my life, was father involved, anything like that. Around my birthday I found out that I was having a girl. I was very excited about that her. Hearing her first heartbeat was life-changing because I could actually hear it. Yes, there might have been something moving but actually hearing something coming into life was something that I refused to get rid of. I feel like I would be giving a life away rather than just getting rid of an organism. That's what made the switch. It made me change my mind and I said, “No, I'm actually going to choose to handle the responsibility that I created for myself.” It was like, “Okay. I'm really going to be a mom.”

I started moms’ coaching around the beginning of the year with Joni. Joni has been such a wonderful person ever since then. I've learned a lot of things about parenting, about the baby, and just how the baby has been growing over time. I honestly did not think I was going to have the support group that I needed until I actually told my family that I was pregnant and they were very happy. That's when mom's and my relationship began to come together and build up from there. My mom was very, very excited at the time (and now). She was shocked as well, but mostly excited. I was even more shocked that my family was actually really supportive rather than very judgy about me being pregnant.

 What I'm really looking forward to like about parenting is getting to know my child, how having my baby is going to build more of a relationship with me and my mom, how my mom is going to be – basically learning and growing with my daughter and just making sure she can have the best experience in her life rather than the experience that I had or my mom had. I want her to get to know you guys (RETA) of course, because you guys are a big part of why I'm on this journey now and why she's still here to this day.

RETA has been a family. It has been a go-to. It has been a number one support group. I would say that RETA has been my second family. I can come in here anytime, and they’ll ask how I'm doing, how my life is going, asking if I need anything. Praying for me has been so important because at the time I didn't really feel close to God. You guys here at RETA are very close to God and just pray for me and pray for my blessings, always making sure that I'm getting the best care possible, making sure that if there's anything I need, they'll pray for me. They'll always be number one. They'll always support me, always say, “You got this, we believe in you.”

 Hearing that from somebody that I just met rather than hearing that from my family is totally different because I never knew you guys before and didn't know that someone I just met less than a year ago could have such a big place in my heart. RETA has been very amazing in my life, so I would say I want to thank Joni seeing the change, the shift in my life, and actually helping me share my story to other people.

 If you are in fear of letting your family know, there's always other people out here that are really are willing to support you in any way. Just keep looking forward and yes, the journey may be hard, but I promise that it will all be worth it.

by Johntella, RETA Client

It's Not Forgiving Self, It's Receiving God's Forgiveness

It’s often times very hard to grasp that God’s forgiveness for our sins is enough and we think we need to forgive ourselves for what we have done in our past. We hear of this struggle often by the women walking through the abortion recovery program. 

A woman that has walked through the study recently entered into it with these same feelings. As our time together went on there seemed to be a receiving of what God had already done for her into her heart and not just having the head knowledge of this truth. What freedom that is found and seen by others when these women are able to grasp the gravity of God’s love for them.

by Amber, Post-Abortion Support Coordinator

Love and Peace in Jesus

“John” is an experienced father with children ranging from toddlers to teens. The others live with their mother, who divorced him. She is in a new relationship, and the children appear to be struggling with the new family dynamics.

John is a follower of Jesus, and I have seen growth in him in the past year. He acknowledges that there is a lot he cannot control about his situation, and he is intentional about doing what is best for his kids.

We recently did a lesson together about how to handle holidays after divorce and it led to a good discussion. John realizes that the past cannot be changed and that Christmas celebrations going forward will be very different. He wants his children to continue to know the love and peace that can be found in Jesus even when life throws them a curve. He has a good heart, and wants to have a spirit of positive cooperation with his ex-wife as they co-parent. He wants his kids to experience joy at Christmastime despite all that is going on.

John’s situation pointed me to Jesus’ words in Matthew chapter 7 about asking, seeking, and knocking. Jesus goes on to say, “If you, then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask him!” In our best moments, with the most colorful gift-wrap, we can never be as generous as God. We know that Christmas is not really about gifts, but that Jesus is the Source of joy and peace. I look forward to seeing John walk his path, trusting God as the Source for all good things for his family. Please pray that they (and we) will be able to focus on Christ this Christmas in the midst of so many distractions.

by Jeff, Men’s Coaching Manager

Good News and Great Joy

During the week of our Christmas Store, one dad, “BJ”, was very excited to shop for his kids. He does not have daily time with all of them, in fact, only one is with him full time right now.

He and his fiancé are repainting all through their house and he has started his own business. He is a hard worker and is a stand-up kind of guy. He is doing all that is required by the court and hopes to be approved for more time with his kids soon. He gets emotional in many of our sessions, expressing his desire to be with them.

BJ was very deliberate in his gift selection, considering all his options for quite a while. “You picked the slowest shopper, Jeff”, he said. Due to the amazing generosity of our donors, he had to visit three rooms in our building to see all the toys. BJ thoughtfully looked through each one, being intentional, voicing concern for one child who prefers certain textures. He did have some plans for Christmas, but bringing home toys from our store was unexpected. He had no idea it would be possible for him to give so much to his kids.

It was fun to hear him express joy, gratitude, and wonder as we loaded his truck with boxes. More importantly, he was exposed to the Biblical Christmas story and the gospel during our session. He admitted that it gave him more to think about than he knew before. Praise God for the opportunities we have to share Good News and Great Joy with dads and moms who come through RETA’s doors! Please pray that BJ’s heart would continue to soften toward the grace and truth of Jesus.

by Jeff, Men’s Coaching Manager

An Answered Christmas Prayer

Prepping for Christmas on any level is a whirlwind of activity. Prepping for RETA’s Christmas store takes it to an entirely different level.This was my first year observing the Christmas store, and I had no idea the amount of planning, coordinating, and problem solving involved to make it all happen, especially on Angie’s end. The end result, however, is one of the most beautiful rewards ever.

First of all, the generosity of our donors overwhelmed and humbled me. The outpouring of gifts and money is stunning. On one Friday, the front office space was packed with so many incoming toys that there was barely a path to maneuver through them. When clients were able to shop at the Christmas store, their faces registered surprise, joy, gratitude, some even showing tears. When given the opportunity to write a short thank you, they wrote heartfelt messages as shown in the following examples: “I’m so thankful for the opportunity to share with [my boys] how thoughtful, selfless and generous you’ve been to make this possible.” “I can’t put it into words! This is a great organization to have donated the great gifts. Just know they went to a good family in need this year.” “It’s one thing to offer programs and help to the community, but the staff and volunteers have such compassion and love for what they do!” “This place is an answered prayer. Thank you for making this possible. I’ve been stressed about how I will buy Christmas gifts for my family, and now I don’t have to worry!” These are only a handful of the thank you notes we received.

Finally, sharing the Christmas story with our clients is a profoundly moving experience. One young mom with whom I shared the Christmas packet had little exposure to Christianity.When we talked about the uncertainty and bewilderment in her own life, I was able to talk to her about my own story and how faith in Christ was my stabilizer, how I never felt alone. We were able to examine how Mary, Joseph, the shepherds, and the wise men all had to take that leap of faith even though they were very much in the dark. As Roxana once shared with the staff, our job is to have the conversation; the Holy Spirit’s job is the conversion. The Christmas store intentionally provided such an awesome opportunity to do so.

by Kathy, Receptionist

New Friendly Faces at RETA

Meet four new staff members who have joined since April! We’re so glad to have these four wonderful individuals on our team.

AMY

Amy joined our expanding medical team in April. She is bilingual and has more than 20 years OB experience, including previously running the Goshen Birth Center.

TIM

Tim joined our Advancement department as Content Creator in April, providing skills in graphic design, photography, videography and social media. He graduated the Illinois Institute of Art in late 2018 with a Bachelor of Fine Arts Degree in Graphic Design.

KATHY

Kathy joined our team in May as our new receptionist working alongside Angie. She is a retired high school English teacher whose passion for learning and interacting with others continues to energize her. Inspired by RETA's mission, she is thrilled to be part of an organization that ministers to God's children.

TIARA

Tiara joined RETA’s medical team in June. She has previous OB experience as well as experience working with women and children in a clinic setting. She is excited that God has led her to continue that work with RETA!

Staff nurse Melody said of Tiara, “I have had the privilege to be part of training our newest nurse, Tiara Jones. She has mastered meeting with clients for pregnancy tests and STI tests on her own, and will soon be completing ultrasound training at Heartbeat International’s Pregnancy Help Institute in October. As I’ve watched Tiara interact with our clients, it is obvious the care and compassion God has gifted her with. When meeting with a young mom who was considering abortion, she sat and listened to her story with intent, and helped the nervous mom feel at ease. It is with joy that she introduces a mom to her baby on the ultrasound as she out the heartbeat and features of the baby. RETA has added another great nurse to the team!”

A Heart Connection

A client came into our office for a pregnancy test. She was single and already had children. She was living with her mother and had just started a new job. Her boyfriend was not supportive in the situation at all. With all of these things stacked against her, she felt her only option was abortion. However, this was a choice she had made in her past that she deeply regretted. It was a very traumatic experience for her and she did not want to go through it again. At this appointment, we were able to connect her with resources to help her with housing and other financial obligations so that she felt like she was able to choose life. But she was still on the fence about what to do. She then came in for an ultrasound and was able to see her child’s heartbeat. She really connected with her child during that visit. She is still working on getting things in place for herself and her children, but I connected with her recently. She let me know about an appointment she’d had with her OB doctor where she was able to hear her baby’s heartbeat. She sounded so joyful at this! I am so happy that she had the strength and courage to choose life for her child!

by Kim, Nurse/Sonographer

Seeing Is Believing

My client entered the clinic determined and with a plan.  She already has several kids at home and could not fathom another child.  Her and her long-term boyfriend had broken up and this was not his baby.  “If it was, things would be easier,” she said.  “However, it is not.” The man she is pregnant by is not someone she wants to be in her life.  She has been working hard to get her degree and will finally graduate soon.  This is not the time to bring another baby into her life.

I sat and listened to her go around and around with her decision.  Then I simply asked her, “have you had an abortion before?”  The words that had been freely flowing from her came to an abrupt stop.  She looked at me as if weighing if she could trust me.  Then said, “Yes about a year ago.”  I was in nursing school and my youngest was only 1 years old.  My long-term boyfriend and I had begun fighting all the time. She said she took pills and thought that would be it, “it wasn’t a baby yet anyway.” However, later on she felt like something wasn’t right.  Her stomach hurt down low and she felt like something was there.  She said she took a bath and with all the pressure she decided to check herself.  As soon as she did she was holding her baby in her hand.  She said, “see that is why I have to do it earlier this time.”  I was over 10 weeks last time and I can’t see it like that again.”

I talked with her for a long while and she had decided she wasn’t going to go through with an abortion if she was 10 weeks or later.  Her menstrual cycles had been off and she wasn’t sure, but believed she was 8 or 9 weeks along.  I began praying to myself as I placed the ultrasound probe on her belly.  Please Lord use this machine as an instrument to show your masterpiece.  The baby was small, not 10 weeks along.  As I began taking crown rump length measurements I continued to pray.  Then the baby began to dance.  Not just wiggle, but a dance before it’s mother.  I quickly pushed record button on our new machine to capture the priceless moment.  When I looked up my client had both hands over her face, covering her eyes.  When I asked her to talk with me, she removed her hands and tears were spilling from her eyes.  She said, “I can’t do it.” “I see it and it’s my baby.”  I continued the ultrasound taking pictures and doing one more video.  I was able to send that video directly to my client, so that in moments when she began to waiver she could pull the video of her baby up and watch it dance.

My client came back the following week for another ultrasound.  This time she began to see how she can take care of 7 children.  She is making plans to continue schooling with a new baby at home.  She still has not told many people about the pregnancy, but has plans to do so.  She has been plugged into RETA coaching and will have an appointment next week followed by another ultrasound.  Seeing was believing this pregnancy was much more then a clump of tissue.  Seeing allowed her to bond and connect with her child, so that she could make a choice of life for her baby.

My client has a lot of healing that still needs to be done.  However, she is starting small.  She is open to abortion recovery support sometime in the future, but is taking it one thing at a time.  I will continue seeing her weekly until her first trimester is over and she has been plugged into an OB provider.  From there she will continue with coaching and they will begin to tackle one obstacle after another and we will do it together as a team. It started with seeing, for her to believe she could do it.  So thankful to all our donors for our new ultrasound machine, that allows clients to see their babies. 

by Brittany, Clinic Director

Persistence & Healing

We had a woman start walking through the Abortion Recovery Support group, anticipating what God had for her, but quickly became overwhelmed by the gravity of the study and having to dig up her past. With encouragement and support by the team involved, she persevered and her persistence led to a much deeper transformation and healing than any of us could have imagined. Now she is walking in that freedom with confidence which has even started to positively affect other areas of her life today. You can even see this freedom and healing on her physically and that is only because of the mighty work God does through this program to set these women free from the bondage they have been captive of for so long.

by Amber, Post-Abortion Support Coordinator

Guys & Tears

I have shared many times with our staff that “everybody cries in my office”. That is actually a good thing, and I will explain. There are many stereotypes about men. One is, Men don’t talk. Surprise—we do. A second is, Men won’t share about personal things. Surprise again—we do, when the circumstances seem safe to do so. Finally, Men don’t cry. The truth is, men actually do all those things, at least in Men’s Coaching sessions at RETA. Regardless of why they connect here, the fathers we meet with love their kids, they want to spend more time with them, they want to leave behind bad parenting habits (sometimes learned growing up), and they want to become the best dad they can.

A client I will call Chas got involved recently. The last few years of his life have brought great pain and regret. He was glad to tell about achieving 12 months of sobriety, and said he wanted to learn “how to be a man”. He does not have access to his children and wanted to talk about issues other than parenting. I explained our Men’s Coaching program and clarified that it is not counseling. In one of his first sessions, we discussed how our inner character can be revealed by our behavior. We talked about what is true of us and what we aspire to be. He talked about being a tough guy and looking like one but that he is really compassionate on the inside. Throughout the session, he became more deeply moved, then gave in and cried. Before he left, he expressed his appreciation for our talk. Through tears and a laugh, he said, “You said this wouldn’t be counseling”.

Not long ago, a man training to serve as a volunteer coach observed a new client’s enrollment session that was led by me. The volunteer and I listened to the client’s story, and heard his heart to just be a good dad after having made so many mistakes. Before we finished, there were three sets of wet eyes.

Please remember to pray for the dads, including Chas, who come to RETA. Kids need their dad, and they need their dads to be the best men they can be.

by Jeff, Men’s Coaching Manager

Happily Walking Forward

A man I will call Mark has a fun personality and is faithful to attend Men’s Coaching sessions. He cares for his three children with the help of a supportive relative; the kids’ mothers are unable to be in their lives due to various struggles. Being previously incarcerated has created distance between him and his kids. He wants to communicate better and more gently with them, and not let stress and frustration come out like it used to. He really enjoys the parenting lessons we do together. He asks good questions and he follows through on all the homework. He is grateful to spend his points in our Family Store, especially when his work slows down.

Mark has shared about attempting specific tactics from our sessions. One of the kids spends more time with him now when they work out at a gym while a more reserved child prefers to watch movies together and talk about them. He recently led them in organizing a better system for getting chores done, and the kids are handling their responsibilities well with better attitudes. He was excited to share about his new way of welcoming them home from school with healthy snacks and giving them time to settle in before asking about homework. It is fun to hear him share these stories with a brightness in his eyes and in his spirit.

Mark is making excellent progress in his fathering efforts. Please pray that he would have more consistent employment and income, and that his family relationships would continue to deepen and be enriched.

by Jeff, Men’s Coaching Manager

Referrals, Risks & Boundaries

Many clients come to RETA on their own, and some are referred. We are so grateful for the community partners who trust us enough to send men, women, and teenagers to receive our services. Our abstinence education program, recently renamed Risks & Boundaries, receives regular referrals from local juvenile probation officers. During the summer, we were busy updating our office forms, medical statistics, and the overall policy. We are excited about the changes, and are confident in the integrity of the program. We serve male and female students 1-on-1 in the office, and we present to groups in local schools and churches. Since 2020, we have even been able to meet with many clients from California via Zoom sessions! As we challenge students to set boundaries in order to avoid the potential risks of sexual behavior, we look forward to having an even greater positive impact in our community.

by Jeff, Men’s Coaching Manager

Parenting Together for a Stronger Family

A couple doing Couples’ Coaching, K. & E., is expecting their first child together. He has children who live with their mother, but he rarely sees them due to distance. In a discussion about the father’s role, he shared about how his behavior with the other children did not line up with cultural expectations from his past. He said most men just work, provide money and fix things, but leave parenting and child-rearing to mothers. It was important to be tough and manly and not be distracted by family or home issues. He talked about how instead, he changed diapers, carried his kids around, and did all the things their mother was doing. He said he wanted to be an involved father with this baby too, and not be left out of important times together. He said whatever people thought, this was the kind of father he wanted to be, that he wanted to do what is best for his child. I told him I respected his attitude and encouraged him to maintain that mindset. Even before birth, kids are better off when dads like this decide to be their champions! K. & E. are faithfully coming to appointments and are nearing the third trimester. Life will get much more interesting for this couple very soon!

by Jeff, Men’s Coaching Manager

Boundaries and Behavior

In addition to our in-person presentations at local schools, we offer Healthy Sexual Boundaries Education one-on-one, for teens and adults. Recently a probation officer contacted me to say that the mother of my teen client was very pleased with how things were going for him in the program. When he had previously met with a therapist, he was told to not obey mom’s rules. He had been destructive and out of control. He doesn’t really have a male figure in his life, because his father left when he was three years old. The mother said her son enjoys working with me and his behavior has improved drastically. She may ask for him to continue doing Men’s Coaching when he has completed HSBE. This young man has more progress to make in his journey, but as he receives positive influence and acts on it, he can continue on a successful path.

by Jeff, Men’s Coaching Manager

God Seeks the Lost and Lonely

D. is a man without much left. Materially, he has some things, but for various reasons, it seems like that won’t last either. A few months back he made a bad decision and exhibited poor behavior. His marriage has been unhealthy for some time. His wife’s private behavior and lack of effort to build healthy relationships have resulted in isolation and an apparent inability to help herself. He desires for her to have a better life, and for them to have a stronger marriage. He wants to make up for his behavior. Nothing he has tried so far is working, and recently things got even worse. In my office, he reminded me about his deep feelings of loneliness. He shared that based on recent events, he feels absolutely lost in every way. We chatted for a bit about immediate needs and what he might be able to do. Then we turned our focus to spiritual things. I was able to convince him to be open to scripture and to truth and to God, despite his statement of agnosticism. I challenged him to read some specific things from the Bible; he wouldn’t take a Bible from me but agreed to read via the website www.biblegateway.com. He agreed that he had nothing to lose by trying this; he said he didn’t know what he might believe next week, but that he would read the Bible with an open mind. He left a bit more hopeful, and with gratitude for our conversation, but with some serious burdens. I am praying and trusting that the Spirit of God will illuminate and teach truth and prompt action that will result in an eternal heart change.

UPDATE

At his next appointment, this client shared his concern for his wife’s well-being, and said he must be stupid for feeling this way. I tried to encourage him by saying that it sounded like his love for her still has some depth. We agreed that love sometimes doesn’t make sense. He seems to struggle reconciling these feelings with his frustration for the poor condition of their marriage. He shared that he doesn’t think he’ll ever get over feeling guilty about what happened between them. He also said that reading the Bible on his phone just didn’t work and nothing made sense. He asked if he could take a Bible with him, and I offered him a study Bible. He was thrilled with it and said one with notes and study helps would be very useful. He asked me to mark the passages we had discussed, so I stuck a few business cards here and there, and encouraged him to call or email if he had questions while he read. God continues to work! Please continue to pray for this man.

by Jeff, Men’s Coaching Manager

Peace to Those on Whom His Favor Rests

You may be reading this just before or just after celebrating the birth of Christ Jesus our Savior. I hope this story will encourage you and will strengthen your boldness for sharing Jesus’ truth and love.

During the week clients could shop in our Christmas Store, I met with a couple to discuss the Christmas packet. At home, they had read scripture and answered questions, and we were reviewing things together. Right away they stated that they don’t go to church now like they had to when they were kids. They said they weren’t sure how to answer all the questions in the packet. They shared a few things about bad experiences at church and other people’s behavior. After a couple of minutes, I was able to bring them back to focusing on the Biblical Christmas story.

They didn’t quite understand “God’s favor” and how it could rest on people. They shared candidly about how some of their current circumstances were preventing them from experiencing peace and joy. They questioned how Jesus could give people the right to become the children of God. They seemed to be truly seeking!

We were able to talk through things in the context of adoption, which they related to due to a family situation. We talked about God the Father wanting the best for those He created, and what they wanted for their own family. We were able to address salvation as a gift offered freely, which of course was timely. We talked about how grace is available, and how each of us have an opportunity to receive it—and that we have to put up our hand and say, “I’d like that.”

Next, we reviewed Bible verses that took us through the plan of salvation. I asked if the verses made sense and they agreed they did. I asked, What do you have to lose by accepting this today? Their answer was, Pff--nothing. I asked, What would it take for you to pray this today? The man said, I would think about doing that. The woman said, I’m not comfortable. I’m not sure God is exactly like this. I think there is a higher power, but I don’t know about how the rest of this works.

We then chatted about how it might be possible to clear up some confusion or misunderstandings. I asked what they thought would be a good next step for someone who sincerely wants to know what God is really saying to them. They agreed that reading the Bible would be a good idea. Fortunately, we had children’s Bibles and regular adult Bibles in a box nearby, and they took one of each. I challenged them to dig into it and to investigate, and to not be satisfied with not having the answers they needed. I told them that God can handle their questions, and encouraged them to re-read the Christmas story in scripture at home.

This couple’s story is not over yet. They will be back at RETA soon. I will ask about how their Bible reading is going, and maybe offer a reading guide or devotional book. We will talk about their hopes for their unborn child. We will talk about what kind of a mom and dad their kids need them to be. I trust that God will continue to reward their seeking and will work in their hearts and minds. I pray that they will personally experience God’s favor, very soon.

by Jeff, Men’s Coaching Manager

Parent Help Across State Lines

A client who moved away a few years ago recently called to process how to handle a parenting situation with her toddler and the preschool her daughter is attending. The mom was frustrated and unsure of how to speak with the school and how to best help her daughter. We talked through healthy ways to communicate with the school and age-appropriate methods to relate to her daughter. She started the conversation in panic and ended with some specific ways to deal with the conflict.

The client called a few days later with an update. She shared that the meeting with the school went great. They came to a compromise that everyone could agree on and she felt good about. She commented that she stopped in front of the school, held her daughter’s hand, and prayed before taking her into the building.

The mom asked that we continue to pray for her. When she first came to RETA about five years ago, she wasn’t interested in prayer and was confrontational in almost every relationship. It is so exciting to see her working through conflict in a healthy way and turning to God to guide her through life. What a blessing to us that even though she is now living in another state, she still knows RETA is only a phone call away!

by Joni, Client Services Manager

3 Dads, 3 Paths, 1 Solution

In the weekly class I teach at the Work Release facility, I have encountered three men who are in different stages of life. Ron* has grandchildren, Ian* has teenage sons and one who is a young adult, and John’s* girlfriend is pregnant with their first child. As we have talked, their stories and concerns weave together with some common threads.

Ron understands that he has limited opportunities to connect with family, and that some bridges have been burned. He has wisdom to share with the younger generation, some of which has been gained the hard way. He is motivated to take the right step today, and tomorrow, and to remain upbeat about potential healing and reconciliation with family.

Ian wants to have a more positive impact on his sons, now that he is no longer incarcerated and has more time with them. He sees potential pitfalls for them as well as positive possibilities. Because of choices and consequences in his past, he struggles to gain respect and therefore, to gain influence in the present. He wants the best for his sons and isn’t sure how to motivate them correctly.

John cried as we talked about his fears about being a father, and as he shared about the road he must walk back into society’s good graces. He wants a healthy baby and wants to make things right for the future. Like many young men, he has not always had someone to walk alongside him who can offer grace, encouragement, hope, and accountability.

For all these men, I pray for God to work in their hearts and to provide for their families. Their families need them, and they need them to be good men.

by Jeff, Men’s Coaching Manager

*names changed for confidentiality

Fly the W for a Life Saved and a Family Transformed!

The Chicago Cubs baseball team has a tradition of flying a white W flag after a win. Here are two recent, very special wins from our medical services and parent coaching.

Abortion-determined Mom Chooses Life

“AD on now. Please pray,” the staff work chat read, sent from our mobile unit. AD, abortion-determined. So we prayed.

At the beginning of September, we had an abortion-determined mom walk on our mobile unit in South Bend for an ultrasound. Our hope in taking the mobile medical unit to South Bend is to reach women considering abortion at Whole Woman’s Health and we’re gaining traction in that area.

After this mom’s appointment, we were concerned she still might choose abortion. One of our nurses, Kim, followed up with her a few days later and, praise the Lord, she chose life for her baby and we were able to connect her with other services!

Fly the W!

Yay, Dad!

A Men’s Coaching client recently shared that one afternoon when his workday was over, he had brought his teenage daughter home from school, and they were chatting in the living room. He then stood up out of his chair, and his daughter asked, “Where are you going?” He answered, “I am going to my class at RETA.” “Why do you go there anyway? What are you doing there every week?” “I go so I can learn to be a better dad.” “Well, then you can sit right down in your chair, because you are a great dad!” He told this story with a sense of humility, and he was very touched by his daughter’s sweet words.

Fly the W!

Triplets?! Please Help.

This summer, I had the privilege of meeting with a mom on our mobile. She had been to RETA for a few of her other pregnancies, but this time was different; while she was happily married and had a beautiful family, she was not wanting to add yet another child to her large family. The thought of the complications from previous pregnancies, long hospital stays and medical issues with her younger children, and the stresses that everyday life brings was wearing her down. With a positive pregnancy test, she was overwhelmed and weary.  

Instead of excitement or amazement at the sight of her baby on the ultrasound, her sense of feeling overwhelmed grew exponentially…there were multiple babies on the screen! How could this young mom add multiple children to her large family and provide the care and nurture they all needed? Physically and emotionally she did not feel she had it in her to do this. I talked with her and helped her process what she was thinking and feeling, and prayed with her that God would give her the strength and peace she needed to complete this seemingly impossible task. In the following months I was able to stay in contact with her by phone and continued to pray with her.

Thanks to our wonderful supporters at RETA, not only were we able to provide her support during the initial ultrasound, but throughout her pregnancy until her babies were born! Per doctor’s orders, she was not allowed to do much work and was put on bedrest near the end of her pregnancy, so our gracious volunteers and staff took action and brought delicious meals to her family, helped out with housework, donated clothing for her children, and overwhelmed her family with love and prayerful support.

Her beautiful babies were born very premature, but amazingly the doctors did not have any concern or see any health issues with babies beyond their need to grow bigger to be sent home! That is very rare in a situation like this, but God supplied her with miracles in abundance!

by Melody, Nurse/Sonographer